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Here Come the Spiritual Directors—The Facilitators for the Religiously Unaffiliated
- By Deirdre Pelphrey --
- 12 Aug 2024 --
Where do you seek spiritual counsel and advice if you identify with no religion? Or even if you do, but don’t want coaching couched in a context limited to one specific faith?
Enter the spiritual directors—practitioners who counsel based on individual spirituality rather than an agenda rooted in any particular faith or discipline.
It’s an ancient practice, possibly rooted in the early desert-dwelling Christian ascetics, who sought God through humble lifestyles, fasting and prayer. The troubled or spiritually hungry person might seek their advice, and they would dispense it.
“Very rarely do we direct people what to do,” said the Rev. Lil Smith of the spiritual direction program at Southern Methodist University. “We hold space for the slow, unfolding work of God through compassionate listening.”
Smith said that as the conventional church becomes more solid and less accepting of change, more and more people are seeking spiritual direction.
“It’s not just about the intellectual knowledge we have,” she said. “It’s the felt sense knowledge, the heart space.”
Another spiritual director, Linda Serepca at Charlotte Spirituality Center, has seen an increase in interest, especially from younger people who no longer attend church but still want to nurture a sense of the spiritual in their lives.
“If I see a psychiatrist, they may not hold space for my religious beliefs,” she said, and people talking to a pastor may feel that “all they want to do is talk about religion, and I can’t talk about the reality of my life.”
Serepca feels that spiritual direction encompasses not just prayer life but all of life. A typical question a decade ago may have been how to pray better, she observed, but today, you hear, “I’m having trouble finding a job.”
The movement has struck a chord, and other religious practitioners have adopted a form of spiritual direction, each with their own variation based on their training and religious background. There are Jewish spiritual directors, as well as Christian, Buddhist and those of Indigenous religions.
The Rev. SeiFu Anil Singh-Molares, executive director of Spiritual Directors International and a Zen Buddhist priest, defines spiritual direction essentially as deep listening and respecting people’s ability to guide and control their thoughts, behavior and life. “We’re not trying to convert anyone,” he said.
Spiritual direction can take many forms. Some are anchored to one faith tradition, while others are not. Some spiritual directors participate in certificate programs at established religious institutions such as the San Francisco Theological Seminary, Jewish Theological Seminary, Southern Methodist University’s Perkins School of Theology and Columbia Theological Seminary. Others do not.
In Canada and many European countries, spiritual directors must be certified as such, while in America, there is no central board, no licensing authority and no required written or oral examination to pass.
Spiritual Directors International seeks to loosely codify and coordinate the art of spiritual direction, seasoning it with guiding principles to make it just enough of a discipline without letting it become a stultified regimen.
Today, Spiritual Directors International has over 6,800 members in 42 countries, of which 90 percent are based in North America.
The organization’s second-largest contingent after Christians are “spiritual independents,” which it defines as “spiritual but not religious” or unaffiliated members. In 2016, this category was too small to consider a category, but it now makes up about 1,600 members.
“This spans from people who were formally following a religion and no longer do, to young folks who are spiritually inclined but allergic to established religions for various reasons,” Singh-Molares said.
In addition to Christians, the organization has Buddhist, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Sikh members.
“Spiritual direction is still too much of a well-kept secret,” Singh-Molares said. “This is very much a growing movement and growing manifestation. As more people hear about it, they’re hungry for it.”
Spirituality is as individual as the person who seeks it. One person’s spiritual experience may be another person’s tedious habit. Serepca helped one of her clients see how riding his bike or listening to music become spiritual rituals by helping him feel more connected to himself.
For the Rev. Katie Nakamura Rengers in Decatur, Alabama, spiritual direction is a means that makes her aware of the bigger picture of her Episcopal faith when she feels tied down by the “bureaucratic ways” of her church. While a therapist helps you get “out of the cave,” she said, a spiritual director helps you “explore the cave.” As Sam Herrmann, who regularly seeks guidance outside of organized religion, says of his mentor, “Pastors have conviction, but with Linda, there was no pressure that I had to turn out a Christian on the other side or even go to church.”
Image credits: https://pxhere.com/ru/photo/1221943, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons.